00.30 a.m

Tonight, I have a lot of thoughts in my brain. And then I scroll up my contact on my phone to find a person I can share all of them. But, I found no one. It's not something you can share even with your boyfriend or your closest friend. It's something that you can only share to person who has same point of view with you. If you can't find anyone, you can share with strangers, I think. 

I like writing in my blog because It's a little bit difficult to me tell someone about my feeling and my thoughts. Its difficult because I'm afraid that they can't understand me and will only make me more sad. I know and I realize every person has different personality, point of view, desire, and anything else. Sometimes I just do whatever I want to do and I don't care about what people say. I listen to them, I respect them, and thanks to them for always care to me. I love them. But, I have something that I'm too curious about that. So, I decide to do it and I promise myself I won't regret it. Even if that thing will dissapointed me in the end and only make me sad, at least I will not burden my heart and I will get lesson from that. 

Yes. Be careful

I wanna tell you about myself

I'm not a kind of person who wants to expect a reply from people when I do something for them. I hope for a reply, but its not from human but Allah. I know Allah will reply all the things that I've done, all the bad and the good. In a relationship, my principle is to give and give. Not give and take. I hope for nothing if I do something to that person.

And again, I'm not person who like to use other people to get what I want. I make a friend not because they have something that can give me an advantage. I make a friend without reason, yes I just wanna be their friend, it's enough for me. Even if I can get something from them, its a bonus, not something that I waiting for.

Last, when I don't wanna be friends with someone in the beginning , its hard for me to be friends with them in the future. Unless they can make me touched and change my thoughts about them and make me say "oh, I've wrong all this time...". First impression is an important thing. Like me, when people meet me in the first time, they will think that I'm an arrogant and creepy person. But, believe me. I'm not like that. I don't have something that can make me feel and do something arrogantly. You need to know me well if you want to know who I'm. And again, I'm not someone you can easily approach because I'm a little scary person HAHAHA 😂